My entire place is almost 100% clean and organized. Just a few more boxes to go through and a trip or two to drop donations off. I have to admit it’s feeling pretty good. Weight loss? Not so much yet. I feel it’s coming. All of these things I’m doing to work on myself to grow, heal, and all that… it’s all coming into an alignment. I feel it’s all coming together. It’s interconnected and intertwined and all that. But I’ll be coming out renewed and awesome on the other side.
I didn’t forget…
I’m still here…
I haven’t felt like posting…
I’m struggle on this weight loss thing, but I’ll get there.
Until next time…
Often times my place has been a disaster. So much so that I have to make sure no one drops by unexpectedly.
I’ve canceled plans because of not feeling like I could get it all done before someone came over. It’s made me feel overwhelmed.
When it’s clean and organized I feel amazing. I have yet to keep it that way.
I have very rarely had my entire place clean and organized at the same time. There’s always a room or closest or cubboard or drawer (all of these or a couple of these at once) that’s off limits hiding the stuff I don’t know what to do with or don’t feel like going through. Much like the Monica closet on friends. 😂
I feel like this an outward display of what’s going on with me inside. I’m busy hurrying up and hiding the parts that aren’t healed, instead of taking the time to heal those parts. That way I have nothing to hide from anyone.
I feel like my weight personally, is the same thing. Its a complex accumulation of things I’m not dealing with, don’t know how to deal with, or don’t even realize there are certain things need to be dealt with.
I am absolutely not trying to offend any one. These my own thoughts that I have had about my own self.
Back to organzing, cleaning, and throwing out things.
WordPress has informed me that it’s been one year since I’ve signed up on here. It would be amazing to report that I have lost all the weight that I set out to lose when I originally started this blog. In my defense my true goal at the time was to heal and grow from an abusive relationship, and then lose weight. I have restarted this blog several times and there have been periods of time where I did not write anything in it. I do believe this is the longest I have kept up with it. I do not have any weight-loss to report at this time. I do think I am down again but nothing significant. I’m still on the yo-yo thing. I’m about where I was a week after I originally restarted this. I hope to report some weight-loss next week.
My goal is to keep on keeping on. I’m trying not to feel a little bit bogged down by the fact that it has been a year since I started this blog. I really don’t have too much to report on from a year ago other than my ex is now completely out of my life, so actually that is a huge success. There was a lot of off and on BS for a little bit. And I continue to heal. I need to keep focused on the positive things that are happening. This is my journey, no one else’s. Mine might take longer than others, but that doesn’t matter.
Those coconut wraps that I posted about trying the other day, I tried them twice now and love them. Great substitute for bread or tortillas, etc.
I’m 25 days in now, and doing so-so. My Fitbit has got me moving again. I’ve been competing against friends and let me tell you, it’s a fantastic motivator for me to have some friendly competition. I’ve been averaging 10,000 or more steps a day. That’s compared to 2-3000 some steps before.
Le Sigh ~
Wednesday’s are not my favorite day of the week. There are usually too many meetings, but there’s always at least this particular one that is guaranteed to happen on Wednesday. It is a hour long, but it feels like 3 hours. Nothing good about it. On top of it, people are awful in general as normal.
Feeling exhausted now.
So I wanted to dive into food to soothe my woes, and I did, partially, I somewhat held myself back, so that was an improvement. Still a bit of a cheat day though.
24 days in.
It has been 23 days since I restarted my weigh loss journey. 23 days. Almost a month. And I have managed to lose, then gain, and now finally, stay at the same weight as when I started. Whew what a ride it’s been already. I am hanging on though! I fall, I get up. Fall, up, fall up, fall, up. Whew. It can feel exhausting. Feeling on the up and up at the moment.
Oh now that I’ve got that out of the way, (my venting portion) let’s blog about something else for a change. Like these fancy new coconut wraps that I got:
I am submersing myself into Pinterest and other areas looking for ideas on how to use these bad boys. Preferably Paleo friendly ideas.
Day twenty two.
Happy Monday. Well I hit it pretty decently today. Fitbit challenge with a couple friends and doing pretty well.
Lunch: mushroom and Swiss burger
Dinner: panera bread pick two – green goodness Cobb salad and cup of turkey chili
Snacks: trail mix with fruit